Sundown today marks the start of the most significant Jewish holiday, Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. It’s a day to ask for forgiveness and to repent offenses against others.
This is a beautiful day for all of us to remember that forgiveness, of ourselves and others, is the key to peace. Atonement is not necessary for forgiveness, of course. We can always choose to forgive; forgiveness is not dependent on the other person. It is a decision to put down the weight of anger and injury. But a heartfelt apology, actually requesting forgiveness, often opens the hearts of both people involved and creates the opportunity for deep healing.
One of the best gifts we can give our children is to apologize to them when we have hurt them in any way, and to ask them to forgive us. Children have such loving, open hearts that they forgive easily, and those exchanges teach them how to be effective in all their future relationships. It will help them be good parents themselves, and good friends. And asking forgiveness, and giving it freely, can be the saving grace in a marriage.